Can we party tonight?!

Parties featured galore in our lives for the past three months. Albeit, parties which were curiously rare and unique in their make –up. For, to start with, Rabin and I would not be dressed in our best evening apparels, but, excuse me ,in our best ‘night - clothes ‘ . And the venue , always our bedroom ! Before anyone jumps into dubious conclusions , let me quickly clarify that unimaginable though it may seem ,we really had no option --- ,for we were both shackled to our beds after a monstrous road accident ,our limbs asunder and every inch of our bodies in excruciating pain . But our spirits ,---thank the Lord ,in soaring heights!
After being salvaged from the devastating accident on the National Highway ,as we lay on beds against the two walls of the Emergency Room in ’ Downtown Hospital’ , a strange undaunted resolve
had crept up within me , melting the almost 100 kg of softie in me into sheer steel. Maybe it was just the survival instinct . I just shouted out to Rabin across the room : ‘Hey! Pal ,We have survived ! We are alive ! We’ll keep our spirits up , right ? We’ll be very positive about it all ? An anguished ‘Yeah !’ assuaged me , and we did not break that sacred vow through out
So we lay in our twin beds of our room ,wrested of all power to move , completely dependent on others for our smallest needs .But we managed with resolve ---and also ,---with a smile .And God ,did we party !Giddily ,outrageously ,celebrating ’ life ‘ in its every contour available to us in our non-A .C . bedroom . We wrote out gourmet menus for meals to the exasperation of my mother and our cook , for we never had the appetite to do justice to them .We played pranks and jokes on our friends and well-wishers , while we were still bound to our beds . We laughed in glee ( or , rather squirmed in pain , as every movement promised yet another spate of agony ) to see our guests bemused , not quite knowing when to look solemn or break into a smile ,as they listened to Rabin’s Countless narratives doled with his own very special humour and ready wit .
I was suddenly reminded of Agha Shahid Ali in Amitav Ghosh’s story , ‘Ghat Of the Only World ‘ .
I seemed to understand Ghosh’s narrative with an intense poignancy .....’Almost to the very end , even as his life was being consumed by his disease [cancer ] ,he [Shahid ] was the centre of a perpetual carnival ,an endless mela of talk , laughter ,food and of course ,poetry .’ How well I understood it all .In the same way our parties too continued .
Every good news ,every progress ,every development was reason enough to celebrate .We had a ‘biriyani party ‘ when the love of our lives , our children , came home rushing to see us .Our son , Shalin ,carted in Rasna of every flavour ,leaving standing orders that every visitor should have something to eat and drink when they dropped in to see us .Then ,we also had a party when our children had to go ,each savouring our repast with gusto , even as each was silently torn apart . We threw a party when Rabin’s iron casts ,( for his traction ) were removed .We were thrilled when he could turn on his sides .I called up his cronies and we had a whopping time with demos thrown in ! And ,finally ,one day ,I could actually drag myself and sit by his bedside and hold his hand .Together ,we said a little prayer . Did we need a stronger reason to party?
Soon good tidings inched our way .Rabjn could be actually be out of bed ,wheeled out , on a chair , something I could do from the start .He could now go to the bathroom and have a proper shower ,sitting on a plastic chair .We were ecstatic ! He dressed himself in the finest lungi ,(sartorial choice being still out of question ) ,and touched up his hair with a distinct curve before the mirror ,and actually sat at the dining table for breakfast, strictly on the wheel –chair all the time ,of course ) .This news was fantastic .It spread like wild fire .All our friends crowded in boosting our spirits ,cheering us ,sharing our joy as they took in our pain . What would we have done without these people ? I feel totally humbled by their love .So , we partied hard and had a rollicking pot –luck brunch . The ‘luci ‘ , ‘aloo bhaji ‘ ‘amor –achaar ‘ never tasted better !
One fine day ,Rabin discovered that he could be quite independent , with the walker though .We laughed to see him take the first steps alone .We revelled as he confidently hobbled his way to the front veranda h to be with his favourite parakeets in vibrant colours .As they whistled and crooned to each other , I saw ourselves crossing yet another hurdle with a quiet determination and inner peace .We served our parakeets fresh and crisp lettuces ,as we munched on crunchy semolina balls .Our little party had its own special edge .
Its four months now .The doctor has declared me fit to resume normal duties . But what about Rabin ? I wait outside the O. P. D . Rabin is with Dr. Bharali in his cabin .HE is to give his final verdict .We do not know if Rabin will finally be able to walk on his own after all .We are all very expectant .I cannot imagine his life without the power to move independently . No one is in any kind of doubt . We had already talked of a short walk on our terrace to-night . Cook has already planned roast chicken for dinner . T .B . ,S.T. ,B .S ., H . N .are to drop in to celebrate Rabin’s first walk in four months .A sudden fear grips me ---it threatens to weaken me .Today ,I am devoid of all strength to go on .Strange feelings of trepidation rush up in me for the first time . Will Rabin be able to make it finally ?Will his healing be complete ? Can the seemingly innocuous art of stepping on his own be mastered after all ? A hundred questions flood my tired mind. I wonder , listlessly...can we , can we afford to party tonight ?